Day 73: Bad mood or depression

One year ago I live my life in bad mood or depression. I was so deprressed and I want to die. Then I found some people who told me about DIP and I start with this process. In few months I see change on myself although I don't work on depression it help me. But now I feel that I go back in bad mood. I feel bad one month and in this time I again talk about death and kill myself. All in my life go wrong and I don't have enough money, I don't have enough bussines, I don't know how survive. I thinking about that I close my bussines.

So I decide I write series blogs about my bad mood or depression and I try to find reason for that. I know that will be so difficult because I'm in beginning of writing and I need some help to see ight points. But I belive in myself that I can go trought this and find where is the bigger problem for my bad mood, depression, laziness and other situations.

So ...

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belive that I can change myself without I go through some situations and change my thinking about it. When and as I see myself to belive that I can chance myself without I go through some situations and change my thinking about it, I stop and breath. I realize that I must go though all situation that I want to change it. In the beginning it must work if you write about most important problem that you have in that situation and you solve other problems too, but if you don't solve explicite situation, you have problem with this situation all the time. I realize this in less that one year, because I have the same problem with depression like one year ago before I start with process. I commit myself that when I see poblem I go through problem I try solve it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to delay with go through depression. When and as I see myself to delay with go though depression, I stop and breath. I realize that this delay don't help me at all and I feel like before begining. I argue with all people that they don't think like me and I want arguing with people because I'm nervous all the time. I commit myself that I begin with going through all situations about depression.